Patti and I renewed our wedding vows during visitation on Saturday September 21st. We got married on Saturday September 21st, 1996, so this was our 28th anniversary. Deacons Dennis and Mike from our church, Saint Catherine of Siena (St Catherine’s) were nice enough to make the long drive out together to visit and perform the service. Patti was trying to keep it a surprise, but I needed to be involved with the approval from the camp unit manager for them to bring in a copy of the vows and the Eucharist. We have had the same visitation corrections officer (CO) for months, so he knew us well and was very accommodating. He cleared out the children’s playroom for us. While it was relatively private, people noticed and congratulated us. Word spread and later that day I continued to get congratulated. Some asked if we got married, so I laughed and explained I have five children. This always gets some good reactions, especially when I confirm they are all with just Patti. Patti spent Saturday night at our friend Chuck and Nikki’s house in Hughesville, PA and then returned to visit me Sunday. Those whole weekend visits are the best!
Whenever Patti goes to St Catherine’s (when she is not visiting both weekend days) there are always a few parishioners asking about how she and I are doing. Some have even offered and stopped by our house to help her with small repairs. It’s not uncommon for Patti (and me when I was around) to stay after Mass for 15-30 minutes to have snacks and catch up with everyone. We’ve been a part of the parish since we moved to Pittstown back in 1997. Deacon Dennis baptized a few of our children. He also wrote a very moving character letter to my Judge (Patti edit-that was mentioned in his sentencing memorandum and mentioned during sentencing). The church staff and parishioners, some who are our neighbors, were also involved when Patti had a silent birth of our fourth child Griffin, back on September 24, 2005 by providing us with emotional support and meals. One year later Patti’s mom passed away in our home in front of us and our children on September 26, 2006 from a pulmonary embolism after lung surgery. Once again parishioners and neighbors were there for support and meals. (Patti edit-Deacon Dennis also came to my mother’s funeral and gave out Eucharist when Father Maurice at St. Joseph’s in High Bridge asked for assistance and called me while I was being induced with Gabriel 6 days after my mother’s death to make sure I was doing ok) So while our Anniversary was not ideal this year, we made the most of it and renewing our vows felt much more meaningful after so much time and so many experiences together.
Looking back, we celebrated our first anniversary with a hike at the Delaware Water Gap and dinner at our favorite restaurant Finnagel’s with our 11 day old daughter Kelsy. For our second anniversary I surprised Patti with a trip to the Sonesta Beach Resort in Bermuda. (We went to the Elbow Beach Resort in Bermuda for our honeymoon.) Of course Kelsy joined us and we managed to keep it mostly romantic with only a few moments of screaming. You have got to love breast feeding, which keeps the infants quiet at the most inopportune times! That trip got us addicted to outdoor shuffleboard. Before then, I thought it was only for seniors in Florida. We also brought Kelsy to St John that same year and figured we would bang out those destinations we needed to fly to before more kids. So the kids did slow us down. For our ten years, we simply lit candles and had pizza on our fine wedding china at home, after a full day with the kids and work. (Patti edit- I was actually pregnant with Gabriel and my mom had surgery that day to remove the lower lobe of her right lung so Jim worked from home and took care of the kids and I spent the day at St. Peter’s hospital with my brother, sister and my mom and dad. I picked up pizza on the way home and Jim had the table set with candles and our wedding china-my romantic supportive husband).
In 2016 for our 20th I surprised Patti with a trip to Maui and Kuai, HI. We stayed at the Hyatt in Lahaina, which had a beautiful pool and luau, which we watched from a distance. We visited the volcano and I booked myself a kite boarding lesson by the airport. I finally got up for about 10 seconds but haven’t kite boarded since. Now it is on my bucket list amongst many other things. The kite boarding beach also had gigantic tortoises, weighing way more than us, semi buried in the sand. In Kuai we stayed at another Hyatt with even prettier grounds and pools and did attend the luau, which I highly recommend for any Hawaiian trip. They roasted the pig in a pit earlier the day of the luau discreetly in front of our ocean view room. We snorkeled on the northwest and southern sides of the island and hiked on the southwestern side in a neat park.
For our 2017 anniversary we flew with Gabriel and Charlotte to Niagara Falls. We took an Uber to the Rainbow Bridge, walked across the bridge into Canada and stayed at an old Crown Plaza Hotel. It was then that we discovered the Canadian side has much more to do than the American side. We went to Boston Pizza and several tourist rides, which the kids were a perfect age for. For our 2018 anniversary we flew into Norfolk, VA with Charlotte and visited Hudgins Pharmacy in Mathews, VA for work and then stayed on Virginia Beach. Charlotte tried out her new electric scooter she had just gotten for her birthday, while Patti and I rollerbladed. We used to rollerblade in New Brunswick when I was at Rutgers, so that helped us bring back some old memories. Charlotte had a blast until she ran into someone, but no harm was done. They have seafood buffets in that part of VA, so we went to one for dinner that evening. I’m a snow crab lover and got some of the kids addicted to them as well. In 2019 right before our anniversary, my attorneys told me the prosecutor planned to move forward with an indictment. At the time I didn’t comprehend how life changing that would be and so I decided not to think about it and took Patti on a business trip to Fort Lauderdale, sharing the news after the trip(Patti edit-he wanted us to enjoy that Anniversary weekend and not focus on how our lives would change forever)I worked, took some staff to lunch and celebrated our anniversary by staying at the Hilton, Fort Lauderdale Marina.The hotel was adjacent to the marina with a large resort like pool area. We walked over the bridge to Fort Lauderdale Beach and had dinner outside overlooking another marina during sunset. It was a quiet weekend(before the storm came on the 26th when he mentioned getting indicted that morning and then it happening a few hours later while I was at homeschool group with Gabriel and Charlotte).
Our next four anniversaries occurred after we started our pool service business and during our busy pool closing season, so we made Atlantic City (AC) our annual anniversary destination.
The weather is often still sunny and warm, so these trips have been lots of fun walking on the boardwalk and dining outside. We stayed at the Tropicana and once at the Hard Rock. (We’ve also been to Ocean as well, just not during our anniversary. The kids bought us rooms and resort credits there as two Christmas presents – See all that hard work raising them paid off!) Our favorite spot in September is the Landshark restaurant and beach bar.
We also frequent PF Changs, Carmines, Bier Garden, AC Jokes, mini-golf and the arcade on the boardwalk and many more neat places. (Patti edit-one of my favorite memories from that last Anniversary trip was dancing under the stars on the boardwalk to a street performer on our walk back from our dinner to our hotel)We typically don’t gamble, but did learn in Vegas during my 50th birthday trip that playing roulette with ones and betting on the numbers (not just black or red like I did in college) can be lots of fun without risking too much money. So we played roulette on our last anniversary in AC. Patti and I have been lucky enough to share many exciting anniversary memories together and look forward to many more. We are truly blessed to have found each other and I can’t imagine my life without her!
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